7 (Even More!) Annoying Words That Should Die A Horrible Death
It’s been awhile since I’ve reflected on annoying words.
I’ve labeled quite a few words as annoying—like these, and these, and these too. Then there’s also those disgusting words and the words I can’t spell. I’ll even admit to liking some words. How about that?
But today I present to you my latest batch of annoying words that should die a terrible death. These words are so annoying they make me want to punch a kitten.
As in: “Haters gonna hate. #bringit #truth”
Hater is now one of those words that, because it’s so overused, has lost all its meaning. Besides being just flat-out cheesy, it’s a softball platitude that’s often lobbed at anyone who simply mildly disagrees or protests on a single point. “Y’all think Obama plays too much golf? Y’all just haters, bro.” Besides that, I think MC Hammer often said “hater”—and if you’re still using a word MC Hammer used in 1992…well, then. I’m officially a hater of the word “hater” and anyone who routinely uses it.
As in: “With the iPhone 6 Plus, Apple has made its first entry into the phablet industry.”
Phone + Tablet = Phablet. This whole word combination thing has to end. It started with celebrities and now it’s invaded our everyday lingo. Phablet? How awful is this trend? What if your aunt raised you and you thought of her as your mom: Would she be your maunt? What if you’re a cat lady and your cats are your best friends—are they your frats? Another really bad one that’s actually commonly used online: Listicle.
As in: “I just love my hubby! He scored two tickets to the Dave Matthews concert!”
Nope. If you say hubby, your husband should leave you at the DMB concert. The absolute worst here is when the husband has his “wifey” while the wife has her “hubby.” I don’t even think The Duggars go to this level of obnoxious cheese. Speaking of The Duggars—what is up with that hair helmet?
As in: “My husband and I have decided to forgo vaccinations and take a more holistic approach to our health.”
This is one of the worst marketing buzzwords in the history of marketing buzzwords. As Charles Barkley would say, “It’s turrible.” Another way to say holistic? “Doctors are stupid.” Which, considering the fact that doctors are pretty frickin’ smart, is a stupid thing to say. Two hours of research on WebMD might make you “holistic,” but it doesn’t make you smarter than your doctor. Holistic Schmolistic.
As in: “I’ve put on 10 pounds of muscle this year. Boom!”
You can thank the bros, and probably Nike, for this one. “Boom” fits in the same category as “stoked” and “YOLO” and “beast mode.” It’s a brotastic word (note to self: brotastic is a terrible annoying word too) that belongs in Gold’s Gym locker rooms and Florida-Georgia line concerts. The only person who has permission to say “boom” in this context is the awesomely awkward “boom goes the dynamite” guy.
As in: “I love eating out on Friday night because wine.”
How do we go and ruin common, everyday words like “because”? I just don’t understand it. You’ve seen this one, right? It’s basically “because + [any noun].” Another example would be “Skipping lunch today because sleep,” or “The supermoon is out tonight, but no need to worry because science.” Why do we do this? Admittedly, I might have thought it was clever the FIRST 100 times I read it. Now, it’s just annoying.
As in: “Let’s spend 2015 focusing on corporate synergy and product development.”
Synergy is one of the worst corporate buzzwords of the last 30 years. It’s the verbal equivalent of bland, unseasoned oatmeal. If you say “synergy,” I hear “blah.” If you double that up with “corporate synergy,” I hear “blah blah.” That word is an affront to the English language. Fortunately, where I work, we can have synergy without using that stupid word.
Well, now all that’s off my chest, so I can move on.
That is, until sometime next year, when a new group of 7 annoying words begins to grate on my nerves.
Agree or disagree with this batch of seven?