Skip to content
Advertisements

The Most Unfortunate Of Typos

I don’t even know what to say about this, guys, but I find it hilarious.

Sarah Welland from Smart Bitches, Trashy Books discovered an extremely unfortunate typo that sometimes occurs in Optical Character Recognition software (OCR). From what I understand, OCRs are software scanners used to convert printed text into digital text that can be used in eBooks.

However, some OCRs apparently have some type of strange…fetish. They autocorrect any reference of “arms” to “anus.” Here are some excerpts Sarah pulled.

“Mrs. Tipton went over to him and put her anus around his neck. ” My dear,” she said, rapturously. ” I have been hoping for years that you would talk that way to me.”

From the title Matisse on the Loose: “When she spotted me, she flung her anus high in the air and kept them up until she reached me. ‘Matisse. Oh boy!’ she said. She grabbed my anus and positioned my body in the direction of the east gallery and we started walking.”

Also: “Mrs, Nevile, in exquisite emotion, threw her anus around the neck of Caroline, pressed Her with fervour to her breast”.

And ‘”Bertie, dear Bertie, will you not say good night to me” pleaded the sweet, voice of Minnie Hamilton, as she wound her anus affectionately around her brother’s neck. “No,” he replied angrily, pushing her away from him.”‘ Well, wouldn’t you?

The moral of the story here is, if you’re using an OCR for converting to a digital book, hire a proofreader.

Or else you might get an anus full of embarrassment. Ouch.

Advertisements
29 Comments Post a comment
  1. Brandon #

    I just so happen to know an editor who works for very reasonable rates!

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  2. Love it; we should probably call in the Department of Pubic Safety to be sure we;re safe, though. 😀

    I was finding much the same problem with a court decision I was copying segments of into a post (though no anus that I recall). Now I know I’m not entirely nuts!

    Like

    May 14, 2014
    • *we’re … the dangers of typing with a cranky cat on your arm …

      Like

      May 14, 2014
  3. Yiiiikes!

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  4. Anyone read a copy of Hemmingway’s “Farewell to Anus”, Tom Winter’s “Anus Wide Open” or Lisa Kleypas’s “Stranger in my Anus”?

    Like

    May 14, 2014
    • You just went there, didn’t you? Haha. Sounds like horrible porn movies.

      Like

      May 14, 2014
      • Or manuals in the gastrointestinal wards in the hospital I work in

        Like

        May 14, 2014
      • Also John le Carre’s “The Night Manager” was about an anus dealer, while I await to read anything that involves a heated exchange of small anus fire.

        Like

        May 14, 2014
    • Don’t forget the Shavian comedy, “Anus and the Man”.

      Like

      May 15, 2014
  5. Hilarious! I especially love the affectionate winding…

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  6. One of these days, I am going to have to get off my anus and get my book published for eReaders. Thing is I keep hitting a snag with the question: To anus or not to anus, that is the question.

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  7. Oh my gosh, too funny! Frankly, I love to say farewell to my anus. Especially after overindulging during the holidays😂😂🙋

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  8. Too funny! Auto-correct type software has led to countless funny spelling mishaps.

    I’ve a friend, that many years ago had to retrieve several binders full of gov’t documents because it was only caught after she had delivered them to various offices, that Word had exchanged “public” for “pubic” in the originals. Do you have any idea how many times the word “public” is used in official government documents? Let’s just say there was a whole lot of guffaws bouncing of the walls that day! 🙂

    Like

    May 14, 2014
    • Were these also Romney’s binders full of women?

      Like

      May 14, 2014
      • Lol, nope. Canadian documents. Good guess though. Wouldn’t it be extra funny if it was someone on Anthoney Weiner’s staff? 🙂

        Like

        May 14, 2014
        • Possibly, but I live in the UK and only have a marginal grasp of North American politics. However, I am trying to find a way of combining “pubic” and “women” with respect to the binders for a hilarious pun. The nearest I’m managing is something about the clasping mechanism in the binders to give a “snappy comeback”. Geddit? Oh well, never mind…

          Like

          May 14, 2014
          • Lol. I think we played thst one out! 🙂

            Like

            May 15, 2014
  9. Ironic that the reader can’t tell anus from arms, as I thought everyone could tell their bottom from their elbow.

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  10. Reblogged this on Ajoobacats Blog and commented:
    Too funny! And I definitely need to laugh this afternoon.

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  11. Very funny, but I’m more concerned about how much of throwing arms around necks is happening in novels—for three reasons: 1) I would never throw my arms around anyone’s “neck” for fear of harming them, 2) After reading these selections, that action sounds very cliché, and 3) Have you ever tried throwing your arms around anyone’s neck? It’s not that easy.

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  12. Typos such as this make a boring book more exciting! Thank you for when I publish my first book.

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  13. oh my god that is hilarious, I am just thinking of all the people who read something like that and what their reactions were…..

    Like

    May 14, 2014
  14. HAHAHAHA! That’s a hell of a way to die, having someone’s anus wrapped around your neck.

    Like

    May 15, 2014
  15. If anything this is just a reason to use one. It’s like an easy way to write a comedy novel, just write a book, make sure to mention arms sometimes and then have it become a book about anus’s. “He held her tightly in his anus” “grab my anus!” or even simple things like “my anus hurts”. Awesome stuff if you ask me 🙂

    Like

    May 15, 2014
  16. But this is part of the project ?

    Like

    May 15, 2014
  17. Oh my… How horrible. I am now panicking thinking I will need to proof read the final version word foe word.

    Like

    May 15, 2014
  18. Perfect example how an error can occur “foe” for “for” LOL

    Like

    May 15, 2014
  19. When I was a secretary in an emergency room using a typewriter not a computer, the word peninsula came up often due to our location. If I had a nickel for every time I typed penisula I’d be rich.

    Like

    May 16, 2014

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: