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Some Of The Strangest “How-To” Books Ever

I wish I could say I found all of today’s content myself, but I can’t.

This hilariousness comes from a slideshow featured on The Huffington Post. Full credit to Huff Po, as the cool kids call it. Today, I present you with some pretty memorable how-to books.

So many questions here. Is this about how to build a “crazy”, tight buttocks? Or is this about coping with what could be considered a “crazy” buttocks? And what exactly would make a buttock crazy…flatulation? And what does this cover photo have to do with any of it?

This white woman already has a rose in hand, but her Asian suitor is hiding a bouquet of roses behind his back. Has this white woman already been on a date with another man? And here she is looking longingly into the eyes of this Asian man? Scandalous!

So, so many things to talk about here. I’ve definitely had moments in my life when I would like to goodbye depression, but it’s never occurred to me to constrict my anus 100 times every day. You know what, I’m calling malarkey on this one. But my favorite thing about this cover is the “Copyrighted Material” small print at the bottom. As if.

I could go in a lot of different directions with this cover. Let’s just say this gentleman seems to take the hands-on approach.

Fish in the microwave? Enjoy living alone the rest of your life.

Dude, that’s just trippy. I wonder if this author read a how to write a how to write a how to write book in order to write his how to write a how to write book?

Beethoven or Humbert Humbert?

Check out more awkward and ridiculous how to books over at Huff Po. In the meantime, good luck with identifying wood.

Any favorites?

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14 Comments Post a comment
  1. paperinahurry #

    Hahaha! This made me laugh so hard

    Like

    September 24, 2012
  2. Ryan #

    The Classical themes cover makes me uneasy. Beethoven or Sandusky?

    Like

    September 24, 2012
  3. Whoa that last one was creepy.

    Like

    September 24, 2012
  4. Teresa #

    Very funny. Almost spit out my coffee.

    Like

    September 24, 2012
  5. Siuon #

    According to some Chinese medical theories, constricting the anus could lead to a heathier life. Thus a happier life. Maybe.

    Like

    September 24, 2012
    • Who knew? It’s actually based on a real theory? Wow.

      Like

      September 26, 2012
  6. Yes, that last one is scary. Still laughing at Crazy Buttocks and “How to Good-bye Depression”. SMH

    Like

    September 24, 2012
  7. Brilliant. Though any interest in classical music I may have once had has now gone out of the window.

    Like

    September 24, 2012
  8. Very funny ! Love it.

    Like

    September 24, 2012
  9. Hilarious! I wonder how many copies of these various books were ever sold.

    Like

    September 24, 2012
  10. Mae Silver #

    LOL! im buying the last one for my sister, she wants to learn piano 😛 This made me laugh, thanks for the post! ^-^

    Like

    September 25, 2012
  11. hackershater #

    The How to date a white woman book is ridiculous, at least the title sounds funny. All in all, all of them are cool:)

    Like

    September 26, 2012

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