You heard it here first. If you’re anti-spoiler, like my friend who got mad at me for ruining the ending to The Great Gatsby—nearly a century old—then you may hate this post.
If, on the other hand, you dive head first into the world of spoilers, then this post is just for you.
The catch here is that these spoilers are only one sentence long—so as not to give away great detail while helping you get the “essence” of the novel’s plot.
Also, these are mostly famous books, so hopefully you’ve read most of them anyway.
If you ever have about 10 minutes (or more) to kill, do yourself a favor and head over to Lousy Book Covers.
If you get a kick out of looking at horrific book covers, then you’ll love this Tumblr, in that train wreck sort of way.
Last year, I posted some samples from the blog, with my commentary on each cover. Because it’s Friday and none of us really want to think very hard, I thought I’d do that again today.
So here are some more recent samples from Lousy Book Covers. For hundreds more, go check out the blog for yourself.
This is a kids’ book.
I don’t even know what to say.
Is this a thing?
What’s going on in our kindergartens? Do we have some kind of freaky, sexual Lord of the Flies situation in our preschools?
Lord help us parents.
From the land of strange:
A couple of weeks ago, Tampa, Florida hosted the 33rd annual Sloppy Joe’s “Papa Hemingway Look-Alike Contest.” Stephen Terry, 56, who’s a software developer, won the contest and, holy smokes, he looks just like Papa.
You can see his photo over at the Tampa Bay Times.
Terry defeated 124 other Hemingway wanna-be’s, including (and this is the most random fact about all of this) Paula Deen’s husband, Michael Groover. Insert your favorite Paula Deen joke here.
Groover was actually a finalist for the Sloppy Joe’s Hemingway Look-Alike crown.
I got to say:
Literary pick up lines? Yeah, why not!
Book geek? Need a date?
Well, you’ve come to the wrong place. Here’s 10 literary pick-up lines to make you have an embarrassing weekend, full of shame, rejection, and self-loathing.
Here we go:
If you frequent the Reddit Books forum, then this is old news. But, if not, hopefully you’ll find it fascinating like me.
This guy found a mint condition original Mein Kampf–you know, Hitler’s Nazi manifesto–hidden inside an old Bible.
Here’s how he explains it:
My fiancee’s Mother purchased a box of old German Bibles at a flea market. Only after inspecting the Bibles closer after purchase did she notice One of them was very different from the others.
Can you imagine the stories that Bible/Mein Kampf could tell? Sounds like some Nazi trickery from back in the day.
Look at me! I’m a nice friendly man. I have a Bible filled with Jesus things. But little do you know it actually is just the container for hateful, Nazi propaganda.
Still, quite an amazing piece of history this guy owns.
I’ve always wanted to be a horse farmer. No joke.
Back when I was 7, I remember walking through the North Georgia hills, dreaming of living on a ranch filled with beautiful, dark brown and white velvet horses. I dreamed of living in a home filled with watercolor paintings of horses, hues of bright rosiness and earthy tones on display everywhere. How I loved horses.
In my teens, I met a traveling Peruvian monk named Juan Carlos. Juan Carlos grew up the illegitimate son of a farmhand and a house maid in Lima. He walked with a slight limp, brought on by years of herding sheep on a rocky hillside. Juan Carlos was a fascinating man.
Life continued on, as it is known to do. One day begins. Another ends. My dreams of horses and my Peruvian monk friend Juan Carlos faded away.
Then one day just a few months ago, I awoke at 4 a.m, startled by a vivid dream. In this dream, Juan Carlos was riding a horse through a damp forest. Juan Carlos stopped to smell the nectar of a honeysuckle bush alongside a clear stream…when an angel descended from the trees.
How have I missed this?
You might know I love To Kill A Mockingbird. It’s a classic. To me, that book is what literature is all about.
Had I read that book in 7th grade, though, my book review would have probably gone something like this.
Videos like this were the reason the internet was created. It’s starts accurate enough, but then things get out of hand.
Nothing brings the joy of humor and the mental anguish of awkwardness like a really, really bad book cover.
Some of these featured in today’s post are just painful. All of these come from an awesome Tumblr called Lousy Book Covers that I recently discovered.
And all of these are real. I wish I could say they weren’t. I wish I could say they were just fake Photoshop jobs. But, no, these are indeed actual book covers from actual, real books. The Lousy Book Covers site links back to all the books on Amazon.
Here’s a few of my favorites: