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Your Search Questions Answered, Volume 13

searchengines

It’s lucky volume 13 of Your Search Questions Answered!

You know the drill by now. These are actual search terms and questions that found my blog–in all their unedited glory. If you’re interested in past search questions posts, here you go. 

Now, on with it:

how to read a story to a group of 1 year olds

Are you kidding? First of all, in what horrible world do you live where you have been cornered in the same room with what you call a “group” of one-year-olds. You need to leave that place.

ned beatty peyton manning deliverance pics

I’m so confused. I want to Google this, but I’ve vowed never to google anything related to Deliverance photos. Where do Ned Beatty and Peyton Manning enter this equation? And what does all this have to do with Deliverance? And is there a hot dog monster in my attic?

what is the correct spelling of the word impossible

Um…I think you got it.

where did awesome sauce come from

The depths of douchebag hell.

magazine sections at bookstores always seem to have men hanging around

You know, that is an excellent observation. Having worked at a bookstore myself, I can say this is true. The man-to-woman ratio in bookstore magazine sections is 3 to 1. Is it the fantasy football magazines? The hot rod mags with bikini models? The metrosexual men’s magazines? What is it?

words for really disgusting people

Sleazeball. Grease wagon. Mutt. Ugly man. Politician. Donald Trump.

picture symbol for chicken nugget

Better question—exactly what part of the chicken is the “nugget” located on?

in the opening line of the 2000 margaret atwood novel, the blind assassin, what happened “ten days after the war ended…”?

Here’s an idea. Open the book. Turn to the first page. Read the opening line. Amazingly, the opening line will tell you what happened ten days after the war ended. 101 Books will not participate in the dumbing down of the high school population through internet shortcuts.

book

Outstanding! Someone googled “book” and found my blog. This might be the height of my blogging career. It’s like if someone googled “store” and found Billy Bob’s Bait Shack in backwoods Arkansas. I’m in tall company now.

sex with a barnes and noble employee

How would you use the lanyard? Or would it get in the way?

And on that note, I’ll close out Volume 13 of Your Search Questions Answered.

As always, feel free to offer your insight into these weird search terms or share some of the strange terms that have found your blog!

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13 Comments Post a comment
  1. Matt #

    Loved this post! Especially that last one about the lanyard. Great stuff.

    Like

    November 2, 2012
    • I should’ve known the Barnes and Noble post would eventually bring some weird traffic. n

      Like

      November 2, 2012
  2. Jessica #

    These always make my day a little brighter!

    Like

    November 2, 2012
  3. ” where did awesome sauce come from

    The depths of douchebag hell.”

    Well played, sir. Well played indeed.

    Like

    November 2, 2012
  4. made my day with this blog hilarious!! :)

    Like

    November 2, 2012
  5. Love love love that someone found you based on “book”

    You’ve made it, seriously, you’ve made it! :)

    Like

    November 2, 2012
    • Haha. I have no idea how, but somehow they did.

      Like

      November 2, 2012
  6. “sex with a barnes and noble employee”??? What the hell? Hahaha!

    Like

    November 3, 2012
  7. lobsterjzombie #

    Payton Manning & Deliverance? What is wrong with people?

    Like

    November 3, 2012
    • That’s the weirdest thing ever. I have no idea what they were looking for.

      Like

      November 5, 2012
  8. sylviemarieheroux #

    Thanks for the laughs! Another great edition, Robert.

    Like

    November 3, 2012

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